Over the last few years, we’ve heard a lot about “nesting” or “birdnesting,” a new approach that is increasingly being adopted by separated parents across the nation. This strategy carries many advantages (and a few notable disadvantages), and newly-separated parents who are looking to implementing a co-parenting plan would do well to consider a nesting arrangement if conditions are right. To help, this post provides a quick overview of nesting and its advantages/disadvantages.
Advantages of Nesting
In simple terms, nesting is a living arrangement where the children remain in the same home. Instead of dragging the kids across separate households, parents rotate in and out, moving between the family home and their individual living arrangements as per their agreed-upon schedule.
This provides the children with a stable, constant environment where they can feel comfortable. It avoids the feelings of “punishment” that many children experience when their parents get divorced, and makes the process significantly less disruptive. Another great aspect of this approach is that it can be implemented on a temporary basis, making it easier for children to transition into everyone’s new lives. Needless to say, the psychological benefits of nesting are significant.
Some Considerations to Keep in Mind
The main disadvantage to nesting is the financial one. It takes a lot to maintain three separate households in California, and many parents who are going through expensive divorce proceedings can find themselves strapped for cash. A temporary nesting arrangement is not nearly as expensive as a more long-term implementation, but the expense is still significant. Wealthier couples, or those who have a cheap/free separate living arrangement, usually have more flexibility in this regard.
The other crucial consideration to make involves mutual respect and a willingness to work with one another. If aninomisity between separated or divorced parents is high, making a nesting arrangement work is a tall order. Parents need to be able to respect each other’s wishes and expectations in order for them to be able to share a living space, even if while at separate times. When hostilities are high, anything can lead to a fight, and a conflict-riddled household is counterintuitive to the goals of an effective nesting plan.
We at R & S Law Group, LLP hope you found this quick rundown on nesting useful. No two divorces are the same, and each family is different. For tailored advice specific to your needs (as well as those of your loved ones), you should always make time to speak with a qualified California family law attorney.
At R & S Law Group, LLP, we offer free initial consultations! Call us at (949) 825-5245 at any time to schedule your consultation, where you can learn more about what we do.